It doesn't matter anymore
this is my 271th post in my blog. my little online diary that recorded my memories, thru thick and thin it's been here. haha..drama-.-.
In the midst of the tough prelims. i think chem srsly sucks big time la. im kinda disappointed at myself at econs paper. fumbled alittle due to the miscalculation of time allocation cuz towards to last essay was really kinda rush, which resulted in i-don-noe-wad-im-writing. SIGHHh. miss lee, dui bu qi.. i tink its a bye bye to the attempt at maintainin my A=(
i think i can get rather insecure at times. and i think i'm drifting further away, quickly, from the so called -circle- oh well. i don care la actually. but wad i care abt is.. i'm beginning to detect the tint of 'calefare' feeling again when there's 'the 3'. N there's nth i can do about it. it always comes back now and then. N it always saddens me.. its just that i don't say only.
7papers to go. 4 after sept hols-.- nicee. its okay. i want my straight As and im serious abt that. label me as a nerd now i don care. I WANT MY As!! to prove that i can do it.
it somehow feels like it doesn't matter now. it doesn't matter. it doesn't matter to me anymore. which is a good thing. let it be. let it stay that way. no pursuit. no struggle. no longing. no more feeling lost. no more at all. sigh of relief?
i rmb last sunday's msg was good. i always feel that sis jean's msgs can always address my heart issues in a very simple, but impacting way. every single time it felt like God speaking to me Himself. no lavish sermon..but a very simple msg on catching a fresh vision of God. Simple words, simple illustrations but extraordinary touch. i caught it.. i caught a fresh vision of God at the altar. and i want to always "catch".. not remain as "caught".
I've always been the kind of girl That hid my face So afraid to tell the world What I've got to say But I have this dream Bright inside of me I'm gonna let it show It's time to let you know To let you know... This is real, this is me I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be now Gonna let the light shine on me now I've found who I am There's no way to hold it in No more hiding who I want to be This is me
This is my new favourite song.