My God is beautiful..all the time-
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Holding my heart back together

OK! tdy is sunday.
me: ehh.. did anybody notice tt i was missing tdy?
sis: YAA!
me: *relieves* o.0 hoho yay. pheewww. like really?
sis: YA! duhhh.
me: so they ask y i didnt come?
sis: YESsssss......
stomach flu aint a good feeling. so im skipping school tmr. hooray.
im starting on another book called "a Love worth giving".. by my all time favourite author Max Lucado.
had meeting on ytd which emptied half of my brain cells. HURRR. v productive. v creative. v hollywood. haha. n i've yet to kill ng shu ai grace. im really a v gullible n nice person. NOT THE FIRST TIME LIAO! chewy n boon always succeed in tricking me. the watch incident speaks for itself. nw comes the tp thing.
me: *phone rings* helloO?? ah yes? u call me ah?(fyi: i was feeling faint from hunger n rushing to meet my sis. in e train)
tp: aye! where r u?
me: huhh? on e train?
tp: aren't we suppose to meet at vivo starbucks to study?!
me: *shocks out of e chair* HUH!?
tp: *frustrated* i waited since 4.30 lor! i left a seat for u liao! we said we're meetin right??!
me: *looks frantically at e time which tells "18.15"* OMG! did we!??? when!?
tp: on msn last nite! u wan me to show u the convo?
me: HUH!! IM SORRYY! i didnt recall! where got !?? omg omg.. *panic attack*
tp: ahh nvm la nvm .. *pissed off tone*
me: *stunned* hurrr sorrY! don have lehhh.. where got... huhh.. sorry.
when i finally reached starbucks n saw her laughin her ass off over there. i was suprised tt i didnt got angryy. i was relieved~ REALLY! cuz i was super guilty n worried. wah lauu.. look at wad a nice fren u hv over here! -points to myself- n... wad a sinister fren of mine to play a trick on the poor struggling-to-walk-n-shivering-from-hunger little me. hao ren bei qi fu. see la!
i rmb cy tricked me into believing tt she scored badly for her pw n i gt SOOO worried over e phone telling her nt to cry n all.. n a min later hearing her burst out laughin like mad. -.-
i shall nt b so naive anymore.. hMPH. wo de ren tai hao liao. LOL
boon! ur pptslide almost made me cry. HUrrr! so touching! -hugs-.. this is lik e first time a fren actually did those for me to cheer me up n tell me to stand strong in midst of all this. reassurance n all. aiyoo..touched=)
sometimes, we need to struggle alittle longer n the winter would last alittle longer than expected. Just like how clay needs to be heated in an oven over sometime before it's ready and harden. i think i might hv rushed the healing time too much. so much so tt im too focused on the speed of picking myself up. N i gt checked while readin tt little story of the tea cup. "Not yet"the Lord says.. i was eager to get outta e hot furnace into the cool air once again. all i shld do is to trust that the Lord has His hand on the thermostat..n His eyes on the temperature. the flames will not consume me. the heat will not melt me.. but let faith lie open in e heat for its testing. to let it show of its true colours.
Isn't it true tt faith can only display of itself fully during the toughest times of ur life? isnt it true tt we always turn out to b the strongest at our lowest point? It is during then.. tt we(will be willing to) throw everything else aside n draw close to God.. to dive right bck into the deep waters of His presence. It is when we hv nothing tt we noe tt Jesus is all we ever needed. Take struggles in life as granted opportunities for faith to grow.. for God's love to be manifested.. for you(who might b too 'caught up') to stop n stand in awe of the Lord=) come n noe Jesus n u'll noe wad im talking abt. sometimes God jus need to smack u right bck to where u shld be.. from gettin too proud with ur achievements(without God u can nv get them).. from thinkin u don need Him.. from seeing everything else more impt. Just lik hw a father disciplines his child.
N things u're goin thru right nw might jus b pimple-sized problems in God's eyes. smetimes u even look bck n go.."omg.. y was i so stressed up then?" so yeahh.. rely on His wisdom n never yours. so things r never really..bad. bad is a .. strong word. bad? think again. 2 yrs down e road u might nt think e same way as u did.
mayb i shld write protected entries meant for only me, myself n the trinity to read. cuz there's too many eyes ard n words get analysed way too deeply. passed e meaning or intention it was meant to be when written.
oh well. toodlesss!
we hvnt been talking even like friends..
the Princess' thoughts ;