hmmm. its been a pretty dramatic week. emotionally, academically(tons of consolidations n revision work), physically. 

i saw you and u turned away. the point isn't too much on tt but more on the hand you were holding. 

i guess i will never forget the call on sunday night. the call that lasted for 2.5hrs till 1. and i will never forget tt sms i receive today at 10am in the morning in midst of math lecture. the call did impacted me alot.. impacted us alot. my heart seemed to take a turn into a different direction. and it kept me wondering for awhile if it's insecurity..for i do not noe if it's really God intended. and Bigdaddy gave a there-you-go-again look at my pouty face. Today He sent me the see-you're-right-about-e-signs sign. a sign to reconfirm the signs.. for insecure pple like me, God gives customized signs and He took the steering wheel of my heart n shove my soul back into place. haha. im amazed at how Bigdaddy noes me. I looked at the sms, dumb founded.. n told myself.. yes i shldnt give up. we shouldnt. and Thank God we didnt. we discovered smth diff abt each other with hearts opened. i shall take tt as smth good=) 

i was reading Shu ai's blog n she talked abt the wall again. yes the wall. now it seemed clearer and we start to verbalise our view on that wall..which existed for who noes hw long. If it takes David to kill Goliath with just stones.. God can help us to crumble that wall with perhaps.. a handful of sand. Note: with God's help. 

Sch's gettin busy n pple are gettin stressed with things n all. Im lucky enough to have my mum to fetch me home from sch everyday. my frens always complain abt hw bless i am=) like i would hop into the passenger seat, buckled up n on goes the ride home. normally, i would lie back n enjoy the air con or perhaps take a power nap. It will be insane for me to go.. "hey mum i tink u shld take the PIE then turn to.. oh no no.. maybe there's a jam on that road.. go by Toa payoh instead" .. and get all stressed up thinkin which route to go. she's been driving for almost twice as long as i've lived and im telling her wad to do!!?  ... God is telling u the same thing too.. 

God's been in control of the universe and how the stars work and now u're telling Him abt wad move to take in ur situation? smtimes, we get caught in btwn wad is and wad will be. we get frustrated abt our postions, neither here nor there. why nt buckled up and take the passenger seat? why not let God be the driver? don't snatch it from God.. you'll probably end up ramming into a tree. don't b too eager to noe wad's ahead and just enjoy the security He provides.

Of cuz.. we get weary.. tired.. when will all e exams end? when will my mum stop nagging? when will the stupid army life stop? isnt it about time to cease the endless work? .. let ur acid-inducing days prompt thoughts of unending peace. "Let heaven fill yr thoughts. Do not think only abt the things down here on earth"(Col. 3:2). Blessings and burdens. Gifts stir homeward longings. so do struggles. look to God for rest.. Drink deeply and hydrate urself in His Spirit to keep u strong day by day. 

As much as i can nag.. i can scold.. or i can be gentle n nice. It's all about u and ur decisions. its abt you and God. its about you and making a difference and effort not to conform. I wan to nag no more.. i wan to scold no more(tt's y i didnt confront u at all, which i wld hv perhaps 1 year ago) ..for i have done tt for who noes hw many times. but i wan to care.. even if in little ways i noe hw to. it may nt be tt ideal way u wld think i care.. but im telling u i do. i don wan to feed u with mere attention tt wont make u grow. 

ok there's Radi8 later=) hooray. n youth day holiday on monday. all youths say yay=) haha.