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    ...Lost in beauty

    Friday, March 31, 2006


    Thought of e day: im cold..inside out.

    last week, i went youth cuz jie was leading worship. i heard tt she is leading worship regularly! once per month. so i'll appear there to support her once a month too. wahahaha. den the worship was good la. she is kinda lackin confidence in her voice...u go girl!! u rock!! don wry n juz SIINNGGG!! hahaa. worship ended n here comes e preaching..or i shld say pre-preaching toking by MR SASHI. hmm.. he was saying " hey..hw come u guys so quiet?? huh?? *den some pple lyk try n act noisy n livelier upon tt remark.*" so...tis very smart guy aka sashi went along n said casually,"all e guys were very lively one..when it comes to soccer. right!? " den all e laughin n jeerin starts. den he made tis comment abt MOI tt turned my face red lyk a monkey's butt. " n debbie..when it comes to shopping..wow very lively one right! wad LV..la..etc." WALAU!!!!!! infront of e whole youth pple leh!!!!! im soo pai seh la!!! every heads turned n STARED at me. n sooo many pple laugh ok!! hahaha. i noe its a joke la.. but u shld hv warned me 1st right!!!!! ARGGH!!!

    ok..sch was ok la. all e laughin n such wif e threesomes. n alot of jokin!!! hahaa. ytd*friday-a day b4 april fool's day*, our class played a trick on TWO teachers. one--geog teacher, miss tan. bertha aka chairperson pretended to scold a classmate of ours aka miss juli. she is ultra fierce!! according to eye witness account aka sammie. hahaa. den e teacher abit the freak out n asked wad happend n such den they passed her e paper tt wrote april fool's day! wahaha. ok here comes next---mr loh aka A maths teacher. we planned to pretend tt it was not his lesson n took out our chem textbooks instead. hahaa. so he happily came in den bertha aka lead actress said in confusement, "huh?? mr loh, its not yr lesson! its chem now!". mr loh was utterly shocked n frantically checked through his timetable n we added on " no..mrs leow changed wif u . so its chem now" he was lyk" huh?? nonsense la!! *lokin soo afraid*" my lungs was almost explodin upon seein his puzzled expression la!!! claire was lyk almost puttin her fist in her mouth to stuffle a laugh man!! hhaha. den sakina aka our treasurer said, " ya..she changed it. she changed it with APRIL FOOL'S DAY!!" hahahahaa!!! the whole class burst out laughin!!! leaving e poor mr loh still rather in shock for a few secs b4 realising tt he's PUNK'D! hahahaa!!!

    ***can u pls spare a kind thought for my feelings? if u hv nt clearly forgotten abt it, we hv agreed to meet today last week. i called u less than 24 hrs b4 e date n wanted to remind u politely again abt e meeting bt u juz said u r not free already. if u cant make it, can u pls make e slightest effort to inform me b4 hand?? juz one sms will do. im upset wif yr nonchalance abt e promise u already made last week.i wont get upset wif anyting at all if u cld juz give me a call a day b4 to say u hv somting urgent so i can hv my day vacant or at least i wont be cancelllin everyting on sat cuz i THOUGHT im meeting u. this is nt e first time...if u can rmb. i thought u knew me, understand me more than any1 else cuz we knew each other more than 8 yrs. i thought u wld take me seriously n tink abt my feelings. i thought u wont hurt me lyk others do. well..perhaps tts all juz wad i tink n not hw u feel. everytime when u do tt, i wanted so much to tell u hw i feel. but when it comes to spilling out e truth, i always backed out e lastmin n tries to forget all tt had happened. i hate myself for being so soft hearted..cuz all tt was in my mind was e possibility of ruinin tis frenship tt i treasured so much if i had done so. bt tis time round, i juz hope tt u can read tis n nt take tis as any form of personal attack but as a thought frm my heart. i noe u hv yr own circle of frens in sch, but when it comes to them..i feel lyk im right at e bottom of yr list. when u need my company, im always there for u. seriously, i feel juz lyk a spare tyre. u may dismiss it as my low self esteem formin tis illusion in me. bt i can tell u..sometimes u treat me a certain way tt tis feeling juz injects into me. i really donmind u spendin more time with them cuz its very natural. but can u pls show me tt i m worth alittle importance?Honestly, does the thought "oh i agreed wif debbie last week tt im goin out wif her tmr but i forgot.im so sorry." come into yr mind when i called u last nite? or do u feel " huh? why she call me? do i hv a meeting wif her? aiya nvm la..she wont get angry wif me". if u hv e 1st thought, why din u say juz the simplest word "sorry" ? if u hv e 2nd one, well..mayb u can try harder to improve yr memory of me. it hurts to hv a person whom i treated lyk my best fren treatin me tis way. it hurts alot in fact. im sure u wont want any fren of yrs to do tt.***

    the Princess' thoughts ;