Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Thought of e day: fear, anxiety, horror, terror.....juz filled my day
i m sooooooooooo X 1000000000000000 worried n scared abt my results!!!! AHHHH!!!!!! there r sooooo mani butterflies in my stomach n i m tembling inside out!!!!! every ting is DONE! is GONE! is SETTLED!! results r FIXED!! i cant do anyting abt it rite!!! i cant!!!!! i m sooo fearful!! whats goin on in me?? i feel so competitive..i feel so evil..i feel so mean...i m so afraid tt i will lose face n others will do beta than me...wads wrong wif me...i noe its wrong, its bad but i cant hlp it!!! GOD!!!! pls hlp me!!! every of my results seemed to be collapsin tmr...they seemed to sux much much much more.....i noe it....u noe it....no one else does..no matter hw brave i tried 2 b...hw convincing i tried 2 act lyk e papers were nth but easy....hw well i had hidden frm e truth tt i screwed all up...all these hypocritical acts fell apart in front of u..i feel helpless..i need ur shoulder..ur hand..ur strength...i cant handle it myself..i cant walk through without u...stress is pilin on me..my hopes are dashed..my world shattered...God.....lift me up...shine yr mercy on me...wash my with yr blood..yr blessings...yr word..n yr peace....i need them always... be by my side tmr...calm me down wif yr everlasting peace...pull me through..let yr love surround me... i shall not b fearful n panic 4 e earthly tings...i will seek yr presence...i noe everyting is in yr hands..no matter wad..let me b thankful 4 wad u did 4 me...amen.
the Princess' thoughts ;
