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    ...Lost in beauty

    Saturday, May 28, 2005


    Thought of the day: my results sux...my days sux

    oh my......oh man...oh freck...oh heck....oh wadeva!!!!! my results totally wrecked.....totally sux...sux sux sux sux sux sux sux sux sux!!!!!!!!!! it sux so much tt i don wanna tok anymore abt it...for those who r concern abt my depression, desperation, frustration and anger u can give me a hug..a kiss...a pat on shoulder...or juz a call will b so nice and enough... but juz neva tok abt my results or ask... it hurts ok? and for those who don care , juz leave me alone..

    jie jie...how i wish u were here with me... at least i noe i wld hv an arms to embrace, a lips to kiss, a pair of ears to listen to me, a shoulder to cry on and of cuz...a heart tt will understand the pain in me... i sobbed so hard...it seems like everyting is dark and hopeless. i felt so useless, helpless, hopeless, and meaningless... i juz felt like dying....no one wld noe e anger, e pain, e regret, e sadness, e disgust, e stupidness i feel right here in me..... i m totally upset with myself...my confidence shredded, my determination ruined, my hopes dashed, my aims cracked, my lungs exhausted, my brain drained, my arms tired, and most importantly my heart, soul and mind broken....

    i juz cant continue anymore....there isnt a way in front of me..i feel dizzy...i feel sick.... i juz cant stand up.....falling so helplessly into a pit....don noe when i will reach e bottom..it seemed so far.. wait a second....there isnt a bottom in a first place...its an endless pit....tt i will fall deeply into...and never get a chance to see light again..never get the chance to climb up again...........

    the Princess' thoughts ;